Turtles, Tuscany and My New Prayer
The following was written for Loyola Marymount University’s 2026 Lenten Reflection Series: Behold, I Am Doing Something New (Isaiah 43:19)
When my daughter was a toddler, she was fascinated with turtles, so her dad and I bought her one. It was cute and small, about the size of a computer mouse, making it a great, low maintenance pet, and she was thrilled! One morning I was startled to find her playing on the kitchen floor, making a ‘vroom vroom’ sound while moving the turtle back and forth like a racecar! I explained that turtles were not toys, they were delicate living creatures that needed to move carefully, at their own natural pace.
Fast forward to May of 2024 and my now-adult daughter, with a turtle tattoo on her arm, was experiencing the most challenging Multiple Sclerosis (MS) flare-up since her diagnosis eight years earlier. The rest of the year included trips to the ER, lengthy hospitalizations, extended stays at a skilled nursing facility, and weeks at a physical rehabilitation center. Although I did everything I could think of to help, there were times when all I could do was simply pray for her full recovery and for her physical, mental and emotional well-being. Like her childhood pet patiently moving at their own natural pace, she gradually re-learned skills she had mastered as a child: sitting up, standing, and attempting to walk.
As the new year brought a steady schedule of physical therapy, focusing on balance and mobility, I began to realize that witnessing her struggles had taken a toll on me. I needed to regain my footing and emotional balance. Tears couldn’t keep welling up every time someone asked me, “How’s your daughter doing?”
Recalling that retreats had always been positive experiences, I began researching opportunities. That’s when the LMU Alumni Newsletter announcing an Alternative Break – part retreat, part immersion experience - landed in my inbox! I quickly applied and last fall, I was blessed to travel to Tuscany with amazing fellow alumni.
It was there, while walking a scenically stunning and inspirational portion of the Via Francigena, an ancient road and pilgrimage path stretching from the Swiss border to Rome, that I once again prayed for my daughter’s full recovery and visualized what that could look like. I optimistically imagined us returning to Tuscany one day to walk this route side by side! But for the first time, my inner dialogue felt “off,” like the uneven trail below; and gloomy, like the scattered gray clouds above. It became clear to me that this prayer, while well-intentioned, was not completely realistic or fair. The odds were that due to MS, she would face more challenges now or in the future. With additional steps and further reflection, I slowly altered my plea. My new prayer, one that may have echoed those who forged this path hundreds of years before, was for faith to believe in what lay ahead, and for strength to accept that everything was going to be just fine.
Behold, I Am Doing Something New. I’m patiently trusting in God’s work of transformation as it naturally unfolds at a turtle’s pace.